Tag: self-pity

Oh That Elusive HAPPINESS

happi

The Art of Happiness. If it doesn’t come naturally, we have to help it along.

Sometimes when nothing seems to go right, Stop!!………Stop all the frantic activity and go DO something you like.

I’m sure you have been told that when you are constantly busy, running around taking care of stuff, nothing changes, nothing new can come in. Your mind is not at peace, your body is stressed out, your emotions are on edge and everywhere you turn presents you with another roadblock.

A glass of wine is good, but maybe not in the morning.

Meditation will definitely get you on a better track, but it seems at times it’s nearly impossible to just sit down and get quiet.

Your mind is racing, your adrenaline is high and the last thing you can imagine is sitting still. That’s why it’s sometimes more productive to do something you really enjoy to get back to a happier place, to find your happiness.

I love to do physical stuff, like painting walls or furniture, digging in the garden, building a little table, fixing something, creating wood-art, practicing yoga or taking a walk on the beach.

You don’t have a moment to stop and spend time “goofing off”, you say? Really? Will you have the time to get sick, have a mental break-down or at the very least get into disagreements with your loved ones? We really all do have time to stop every once in a while. 

We have to prioritize. What is more important in this moment: What we are doing or our sanity?

Do something you enjoy!

Your kids can miss a soccer game once in a while. If you don’t make it to the grocery store after work, you won’t starve. Your spouse can take care of that task without you. If you don’t have a spouse, leave it for another day (it works for Latinos….manana). Ask someone for help. People really do want to help, as long as you don’t abuse it.

I have a couple of rental homes and one of them had a serious roof-leak. It literally rains in. The tenant had to put some pots and pans out to catch the drips. This stresses me out to the max. The thought of the tenant being upset, the damage the water is causing, the expense……on and on. In the meantime, I can’t get a hold of the roofer. It won’t stop raining (I’m in NC right now). But, I suddenly realize, I have absolutely no control over this at the moment. I already left a message for the roofer. I apologized to the tenant. “Money comes easily and frequently” (my favorite mantra).

It was out of my hands.

Still tense, I located my paintbrush, pulled out that new can of paint and started painting my bathroom.

My mind calmed down in minutes, a space opened up for better thoughts, my breathing regulated…..all without me having to work hard at it. That’s the best part! I am tired of working so hard at everything. Aren’t you?

Then I remembered three things that always shift the energy and open the door for happiness:

1. Stop Feeling Sorry for Yourself!

Self-pity is the very worst kind of emotion. It kinda sneaks in there and before you know it you are all about it. It destroys everything around itself, and leaves you feeling powerless.

Stop being the victim, stop feeling sorry for yourself – and be happy.

2. Be Grateful

Life is so fast-paced that we rarely recognize and acknowledge the wonder of it all.

Think of all the things you’re grateful for right now: family, health, home, your puppy, your red shoes, the grass, the sunshine, everything. Spend time being grateful each day – and be happy.

3. Accept What Is

We frequently resist what is. Just say “Yes!” more to all of life’s experiences. Don’t fight the river’s current. Say Yes!” more to emotions, situations, social invitations, adventures – and be happy.

Before I knew it I was smiling. Happiness…………it’s a process, not a destination.

To Your Happiness, with Love

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