How the practice of letting go of control can help us find the magic in life.
Some days I wake up and want everything to be orderly and predictable. That’s unusual, because I have a spontaneous, risk-taking personality.
When this happens, I notice that I’m feeling a bit unsafe, kind of insecure about my life. Maybe I recently had a disagreement with someone important to me or maybe I’m worried about my finances. It’s some kind of anxiety, some form of fear.
This anxiety does not come from situations, but from our brains creating stories. So our need for control or structure is a reaction to our mind telling us that we have no control
But we are human and we all have a need for structure. Some of us more, some less. It gives us a feeling of safety, a feeling of control. Even though this sense of safety is an illusion, it’s ok; it’s a human longing in our changing world.
If you become too rigid, though, you run the risk of missing out on the beautiful things in life.
Rigidity or trying to control everything also contributes to depression and a feeling of hopelessness, like there is nothing left to look forward to.
Sometimes this inflexibility comes with age; sometimes it’s something within that you were born with. Sometimes it was created by your circumstances in childhood.
So it’s good to be aware of your need for structure, monitor it and change it up a bit every once in a while.
It’s not comfortable at first to change your routine, it probably even feels scary, but we only grow (and have lots of fun) when we step out of our comfort zone.
If you always do your grocery shopping on Saturday, for example and can’t accept an invitation for a get-together, you might be missing out on some wonderful experiences that only happen spontaneously.
Make yourself go shopping on Thursday after work maybe. It might make your day longer and maybe more harried, but what if you meet your next friend in that check-out line? What if your Saturday is open and you end up at someone’s backyard cook-out, where you have more fun than you’ve had in a while? What if you meet that one person who changes your life for the better?
Over-planning or controlling kills magic!
You will find the delightful, the magical, the enchanted in the spontaneous moment of life. They will show up in unplanned moments, and unexpected situations.
Let’s live fully.
Let’s be alive.
Let’s say YES to life.
Let’s go out today and do it differently than yesterday.