“Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won’t either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.” -Louise Erdrich
Sometimes, when I read profound wisdom or insights from others I like to share that with you. Is it possible to create miracles in our lives, a holy shift?
We all experience things we don’t like, right? How can we change that?
Can we change that?
Here’s one about creating shifts in our lives.
Lauren Lane Powell is a gift to all of us who know her. She is a medical miracle, a 3 time cancer survivor.
She didn’t just survive, but healed herself with humor and love. (follow her story on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/lauren.l.powell.3)
Here’s a true account of one of her experiences:
“I teased you yesterday with this meme and a promise to share a technique or two to allow us create the Holy Shifts we want to see in our world. First I get a chance to practice myself!
In the mail yesterday came my first insurance claim forms from my new Medicare Anthem part D. It looks like IU Medical is out of network and that I owe $25,000+! I felt all of the normal physical reactions of fear and anger. My chest tightened. Tears formed. Face flushed. My husband and I railed together for a while and continued the downward spiral.
We watched Glee before bedtime but my favorite character died! No help at all!
I couldn’t sleep. Worry. Fear. Financial panic. Then I remembered. Get into the vortex. Feel good no matter what! THEN allow things to work out for you. They always do.
“Things are always working out for me” was my first chant. As I said this over and over again I remembered in 2012 when I didn’t have any insurance at all! What miracles came through! I felt a little better. Then I remembered my music. I listened and sang softly, feeling more as ease and finally fell asleep. It was after 1am.
I woke knowing the rest of story.
This insurance shift, this political shift, this is CONTRAST!! When everything’s coming up roses we do not grow, change, evolve or expand. It’s only when we are uncomfortable, discontent, that we change. So what if…
What if I embrace the contrast! What if I see it for what it is and, in the midst of it all, say “I see this for what it really is! An opportunity for me to decide what I really want because now I know what I don’t want!”
For me to know that and see that I must feel better now! But feeling better ABOUT the insurance shift or the political-education shift just may not be possible. So feel good about something else! Anything else! Then see what you can do from THAT perspective.
When I feel good on purpose, my head is clear, my heart is open and inspiration comes. Most times I’m reminded to focus on the big picture outcome. I want to feel peaceful and secure knowing I’m well insured. That may be too specific yet. I’ll stick to peaceful and secure.”
Lauren used Mindfulness to become aware of her reactions, then she changed those reactions.
We don’t always catch ourselves in the moment.
As long as you become present at some point. That’s where your power lies….in the present moment.
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We all have a dark side and we are masters at hiding it.
We all have traits within us that we don’t like. Usually we choose not to look too closely or we practice complete denial. It’s not at all easy to get real with ourselves.
I found there are two types of people in the world, those who want to know and those who want to believe. People don’t want to hear the truth because they don’t want their illusions destroyed.
Interesting, isn’t it? You can see it if you look at the people in your life.
Do you know into which category you fall?
I know that I want to know. I want the truth.
One of my greatest challenges is to look at life with curiosity, rather than my same old accusing attitude. It’s a habit that’s been well taught and has become deeply ingrained in my psyche. As I started to observe myself doing that, it became the proverbial onion: I found many layers.
Looking deeply at my dark side was painful. I didn’t like admitting that I’m not all wonderful all the time and recognizing the various petty grievances I have.
I’m pretty spontaneous in general, but when I make plans and they don’t work out according to my schedule, I get pretty annoyed…..not only with the situation, but especially with the people involved. That annoyance can last a while.
I first noticed my attitude with bigger things, like planning a trip and someone throws a wrench in it, which causes us to leave late or worse, not at all.
You may think, oh that’s not a big deal. But then I saw that I do this not only with big plans but little ones as well. Like planning to have a cup of coffee and we have no creamer, because the last person to use it didn’t replace it. Grrr!
At the same time I began to notice people who don’t have my outlook for whatever reason.
I saw that they struggle too, they try to make sense of what is happening, but then some sunlight shines in and they begin to smile. They take on a positive mindset and move forward.
I quickly realized that it’s pretty pervasive, this attitude of mine. It shows up in areas I never even considered.
I want to change that. The fact is, stuff happens. If things don’t go my way, the alternative could be better, more exciting, interesting, whatever. If I can be open, who knows what great things can come out of that situation?
One thing I know for sure, nothing good comes out of my bad attitude. Definitely not peace. Only frustration for me and emotional distance from the person I care about.
So….. change! How can I change it? It requires daily practice to become present to this and create a different neural pathway.
A good way to visualize this is by imagining a well worn narrow path created by a heavy vehicle. You can literally see the tire tracks from the frequent use. It becomes difficult to navigate that path without slipping into that rut. It’s just easier to stay on that track.
Changing that path requires presence of mind and a deep commitment.
Deep within us there is resistance to something different, unless we create a ritual and some type of support for a new way of thinking.
At first, as we try to create a new path, we continue to slip back into that well worn groove, but with perseverance it happens less and less. We create a new neural pathway, which becomes stronger the more it is used.
It’s simple, but not easy.
Once you decide that you want to commit, here are some steps to support your efforts:
- It’s important to create some kind of ritual.
You have flexibility here, because we are all different. Find some moments of stillness each day. One of my favorites is mindfulness meditation and some Kundalini yoga. If you have no idea what that is, don’t worry, simply take a moment each day to sit quietly, breathe and focus on your goal. Observe yourself, notice what you are doing, thinking. The object is to become present to yourself.
- You have to get support
Find someone with whom you can discuss your thoughts and insights. No man is an island. Being isolated in this pursuit is a surefire way to slip back into the same old groove. Like an alcoholic, or any kind of addict, needs a support group and a different environment, we need someone who holds us accountable. Otherwise the old patterns just push their way back into our lives.
If there’s no one in your life right now, find a group online. Find a MeetUp. Email me.
- Do not judge yourself harshly!
When we are tired we fall back into old patterns. When we are overwhelmed, we typically lose our ability to be positive and strong. Recognize when you need to just be. Degrading yourself for your humanness isn’t going to change your old patterns faster. The best way to see change in our lives is to be kind and loving to ourselves.
We had a plan and as it often happens….plans don’t turn out the way you want.
Life happens, while you are making other plans, right!
Our plan was to sail to Cuba.
We have a large Catamaran sailboat, fully stocked, and after many months of preparation we were finally ready to go.
Very soon, a series of unplanned things happened along the way. Our engines broke, not just once, but 3 times. The plumbing started leaking into the boat and it had to be completely re-plumbed. We had to wait for better weather…..sometimes for weeks.
I really do enjoy being on a boat, cooking nice meals, making it comfy and appreciating the sun. Being out on calm seas is the most relaxing thing I know, because you literally can’t do anything else. I love the steady rocking of the boat and being on the water has a soothing effect on my psyche.
What I can’t handle is being at the constant mercy of the weather, wind and water. Everything is perpetually damp or wet. I am petrified when the waves are more than 3 feet and pound the boat, or you lose control of your direction, because the wind has other plans for you.
So when we hit bad weather, I learned that I’m not a sailor!
Everything in life has a good side and a bad, positive and negative. It’s life, the duality. How else would we appreciate the good, if we didn’t experience the bad?
The bad in this case is that we aren’t going to Cuba on a sailboat. Our lovingly planned trip isn’t happening. We aren’t sailing to Cuba. It’s a disappointment.
The good side is………….
When you are on the water, you meet lots of people of all ages and backgrounds. Boating people are generally very friendly, hospitable and generous. I think the transient nature of boating makes us more open, we stick together and support each other.
We help each other tie up as a new boat approaches the dock at a marina, provide a lending hand if there is a problem and easily sit together over dinner and a glass of wine.
In the course of this, you learn quite a bit about people. You learn their stories, their struggles and their triumphs. You learn about their lives.
What I learned was the almost infinite variety of life-styles that exist on this planet.
As good citizens of western culture, we grow up participating in the norm. We get educated, work at an accepted job, live in an acceptable home and generally follow the cultural “dream”.
We are conditioned to believe that is the right and only way to live. We don’t have another yardstick by which to measure. We believe that this is life and we strive toward it, often at the expense of ourselves….getting stressed out and worn out in the process.
It’s a case of “you don’t know what you don’t know”.
I didn’t know there was another way for a long time. I grew up in a middle class household. My father grew his business into success and my mother stayed home. All the people around us had similar lives. Discussions revolved around our expectations for this life and what we kids would become when we grew up.
We didn’t know people who went against the norm, who lived on boats, climbed mountains, traveled on a shoestring or chose to live with very few possessions, because they recognized what was important to them. Someone in the course of their lives gave them permission to do it differently or they had the calling and courage within to go against the cultural pattern.
Being an observer and a voracious reader, I learned that life can be done differently. It’s easy to see when we look at the lives of other cultures. Within those cultures we find the rebellious, the brave, the different. If we aren’t exposed to other options, we can learn by trial and error, as I did on our sailing trip.
It was an adventure explored. The good far outweighed the bad.
My point is: This is your life! No one else can live it for you, you don’t need approval from anyone. It takes courage to contemplate what you might like outside of the box that was set up for you. Being constantly stressed out with what you are doing might be a good indicator to re-examine things.
Socrates said: “The unexamined life isn’t worth living”
It’s about feeling happy. When you feel good, you have more to give. A depleted soul has nothing to give.
Someone in one of my workshops mentioned feeling guilty when she did things for herself.
This is not about selfishness. Everything worth having needs to be nurtured. Especially the Self! Whatever we don’t nurture withers away.
Ask yourself….how do you feel when you constantly neglect yourself and only look to please others? You neglect your body, mind and soul. Your body will get sick, because you don’t care for it properly. Your mind will be exhausted and frazzled by others’ demands, because you don’t know your limits. Your soul will feel no peace, because you are dismissing the very essence of yourself.
Whatever your philosophy, there are a few immutable truths in life:
- What we regret most at the end of our lives are the things we didn’t do.
- The degree of understanding and compassion you have for others is in direct relationship to how you treat yourself.
- Quality friendships and relationships keep us happier and healthier in the long run.
So, go out and do what lights you up, excites you and invigorates you. Do it with others who are supportive of your life-style and show your appreciation and support in return.
In case you want to sail to Cuba, here is some information: http://cubajournal.co/how-to-legally-travel-to-cuba-from-the-u-s-on-your-yacht/
We have lost a great soul on this earth. His family posted in social media that: “Wayne has left his body, passing away through the night. He always said he couldn’t wait for this next adventure to begin and had no fear of dying. ” Wayne Dyer has contributed so much to our lives through his books, talks, PBS specials and simply his presence.
One of his famous quotes is: “Love is my gift to the world. I fill myself with love, and I send that love out into the world.”
It was his purpose to re-discover the meaning of life and share it with us, guide us and inspire us. I’m forever grateful to have had the opportunity to experience him in my life.
In honor of his life, Hay House is offering his film “Shift” for a limited time for free. I want to do my part by sharing this link with as many people as I can, because if you are just a little bit willing, it can bring a shift into your life. It is a message we all need to hear.
On some level we are all searching for something. It is built into us, we can’t escape it. We might pretend otherwise, but it keeps tugging at us.
We long to find meaning in our lives, we long for love, peace, joy and purpose.
However, the world we live in is a paradox, an insane place. All you have to do is call a big organization: You will be told “Your call is important to us” and then be put on hold for an indeterminate amount of time. Really?
Governments are meant to serve, but do you feel served or more like a victim of bureaucracy?
We will be punished if we don’t pay our bills, but our governments, who are supposed to represent us, continue to accumulate more debt and print more money. They don’t pay their bills.
Everywhere you look, the action does not reflect the words. The answer is not out there!
Wayne Dyer said: “Society demands conformity at the expense of individual liberty. Let us be for once a non-conformist to be fully alive.”
Our businesses, the media, laws and governments are not run by enlightened, kind, caring people. How can it not be confusing and illogical to follow society’s rules? That is not where the answers are!
In his film “Shift”, Wayne Dyer gently guides us back to ourselves where we have the answers. He does it with such humility, kindness and patience that we lay down our defenses and listen. He does it with such integrity that you feel trust and a willingness to acknowledge the truth of his words.
So take a few moments to watch this powerful movie and let me know if it made a difference to you.
I’ll leave you with some of my favorite quotes by Wayne Dyer:
“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
“If you have a choice between right and kind, always choose kind”
“Live one day at a time emphasizing ethics rather than rules.”
“A mind at peace, a mind centered and not focused on harming others, is stronger than any physical force in the universe”
I have been posting an August gratitude challenge on facebook and was thinking a lot about the people in my life who give of themselves, who make a difference in the lives of others, who step up, who show they care. They go out of their way, they make sacrifices to help others, they empower their fellow human beings.
In our era of selfies, self focus, all things self….. that takes some effort.
So many articles, videos and talk shows lecture about focusing on yourself, doing what feels right to you, making your life the best ever; in short living a life centered around self. Life is supposed to be fun, joyful and happy. Oprah talks about it, life coaches, counselors and even your friends tell you that this is how life is meant to be.
We are encouraged to always sound upbeat and empowered, springy and positive. As Americans we already do a lot of that.
I think it is important to know who you are and what you want in life. It is true that you create what you think; therefore think clearly, watch your thoughts and be focused. I also teach that and have written about living a successful life.
However, there is a vast number of people who are lost, confused, lonely, suffering in poverty, maybe with a serious illness or they simply have lost hope.
What if they aren’t in a good space in their lives at this time? Don’t we all have moments that feel like life is waging a war with us. Is that when we are supposed to pretend, be in denial?
What if they are living in poverty? All that matters then is survival. Those lofty goals of positive thinking and esoteric ideas are very low on their priority list.
What do we do when we see a fellow human being suffer? Turn away, because we don’t want to put our efforts there or have our energy dragged down? Or maybe we don’t want to look at the despair of another because it’s a reminder that it could be us and we are desperately working to stay in a good space? It can be scary to look at the dark side of life, to face the inner demons we all battle.
But life is not one dimensional! There can be no light without darkness, no good without the bad, no up without the down.
These are the facts!
But we tend to get on the bandwagon if it sounds good and we forget to think or dig a little deeper.
With that in mind, I am feeling grateful to know some real live heroes.
One of them is Richard Lawson, a young man who gave up his life to travel the globe to help orphans and girls who are sold into the sex trade. You can read about it on his website: www.lovingorphansglobal.org and I wrote about him in my book: “Step On It” http://amzn.to/1lNBScK
Another is Alicia Kozuch Komar at http://www.buenpower.com. She saw a need for light in Peru in remote, poverty stricken villages. Children who walk for miles to attend school, have no day light left to read or do homework. Families cannot finish their work because it is dark. Alicia sacrifices her life and needs to bring solar powered lights to others.
Dave Elsberry rides a bicycle across the country to raise money for MS victims at http://daverides.com. He recently rode from California to Maryland in 7 days. He has a heart the size of Texas.
Pam Lewko Elsberry is by far the most loving, generous, kind, inspiring business associate I have ever worked with at www.lyoness.com. If you want to make it, she’s there to make sure you have the tools.
Your not so average Real Estate investor, Jim Ingersoll, believes in truly helping people who are looking to find a better way by being real and living like a true Christian at http://investingnownetwork.com
There a many more heroes in my life, many who quietly go about helping, inspiring and uplifting others on a daily basis. I know that’s who I want to be!
It has become such a common topic of conversation and it seems that everyone is an expert. Yes, just think better thoughts and your life will change.
Believing in the law of attraction seems to be the norm now. At least in my circles and also in most things I read. But the really honest people have begun to voice doubts and are raising questions.
Well, if it’s that easy, why hasn’t anything manifested? Why has nothing changed?
These are people who are doing the work. They meditate, they have laser like focus, they have a vision board or some kind of written goal, and they practice a positive outlook.
What is going on?
I do believe in the law of attraction. I do believe that our creator has put laws in place for us that rule our earthly existence. But when has anything been really simple?
Has it been in your life? It certainly hasn’t been in mine.
We believe because we have had an experience that confirms our thoughts.
First my story on why I believe.
When I lived in Virginia, I created vision board with just a few pictures. Material possessions weren’t a main goal at that time, my lifestyle was my top priority. I wanted to live in California, by the ocean, with a garden, restaurants and stores within walking distance and freedom in my work and way of life. The pictures I cut out stirred my soul and made me smile every day. I taped that vision board on my refrigerator and looked at it every morning while drinking my tea or coffee.
Within a year I had everything on that board. I didn’t even realize what was going on while it was in process. My husband got a job offer in California. We packed up a huge house full of stuff. He came out before I did and chose a place to live. All my previous work led up to this and gave me the financial freedom to live my desired lifestyle. I created my garden.
That was many years ago. In the meantime, I was led to work in a different arena where I spoke to many people about life.
This is what I have seen so far:
- We often do not recognize our deepest beliefs (such as a deep sense of unworthiness or guilt).
- We may be carrying old stuff, such as past life trauma or beliefs (that’s a topic for another time)
- We may be so conditioned by society that we “want” what we are taught. In other words, we don’t really want it.
So of course, when we layer a desire on top of those deep-seated old patterns, it cannot bring you the consciously desired outcome.
You may get close enough to almost have it, but then it vanishes. Maybe that has happened to you more than once.
Depending on your general outlook on life, it can leave you frustrated to the point of giving up (wanting it) to feeling deep despair to giving up this life. I have seen that close up. It breaks my heart.
So, what is the solution?
Life on this planet is constantly expanding. Wouldn’t you agree?
We are experiencing things, awarenesses, lifestyles and possibilities we have not had before. A simple example is flying. A century ago my grandmother didn’t fly anywhere. She traveled by car at best. Then only the wealthy or well to do had the opportunity to get on a plane. Now, it seems everyone has been on a plane.
It’s the same with our awareness. A century ago we were still very focused on survival, fitting into a rigid society, we now have reached a way of life in which we can give attention to more esoteric topics.
Let’s go out on a limb here.
Life is energy, vibration. Many invisible forces are at work.
Some people on our planet are connected to these forces. They can see your energy, your vibration, maybe your past lives and deepest beliefs. They can channel God’s love and healing powers.
Check out “John of God” in Brazil, for example.
Maybe you have had a past life or experienced a traumatic event that has etched itself into your cellular memory. These things are difficult to eradicate with visualization only.
Maybe you feel deeply unworthy and are not aware of it. It’s a common human condition.
Utilize the abilities of these healers. See an intuitive, a psychic, a channeler. Go to workshops, retreats, get acupuncture, acupressure, cranio-sacral work, nutritional guidance.
There is so much out there. You will know or sense what is in your best interest.
If money is an issue, find people who have a deep trust and faith and will ask for donations only.
Even if you just explore, you will get answers you did not have before, which will guide you to your purpose.
For example, I have had only two cranio-sacral treatments in my life. After the first one, I couldn’t even have told you what it was. I only knew it was a powerful, life-changing experience for me.
Now I can tell you more about it, since the second one was equally powerful.
What I am saying is: Don’t give up!!! Explore, try different things and trust that your life is on purpose.
Check out our retreats, complete with healers and access to higher vibrations.
www.christinadevalencia.com go to Retreats and Events
or contact me email@example.com
If someone were to ask, “what do you love most about yourself?” What comes to mind? Do you have a quick answer, or does it take some thought? Can you even come up with an answer?
It probably depends on the kind of day or week you are having. We can more easily access that self-love when we have good days, when things are flowing, relationships are calm. On difficult days– the kind that are full of struggle, too much activity and doubt– that self-love can virtually disappear or play a serious hide and seek.
When I was asked that question just the other day, I drew a blank. Nothing, I mean nothing came to mind.
What is going on, my Self admonished itself. You must know something you love about yourself. You have been working on this all your life. What a fraud you are!
I began to frantically dig around in the hidden cabinets of my mind, where this important information is stored. Nothing! Oh I found some crumpled reminders to love my body, to do loving things for myself, to take some moments each day……blah blah.
All this searching stressed me out. I had to come up with an answer, I was being held accountable.
OK, deep breath. “You’ve had a massively challenging week. You got this.” I took the comforting approach toward Self.
What I found was that when we have too much going on, that old recording starts playing again. You know the one we keep working on; those negative voices that have a never ending reservoir of our inadequacies and shameful secrets. They just sneak in, you don’t even notice them, they are so stealthy and quick. That is why it is so important to stop every so often and not let life overwhelm us. That is why we have to take some time to play, be silly…..and not take things too seriously. Because when we play, we literally shut the door to those voices, they can’t find the entrance.
Especially now during the holidays! Let’s take a deep breath together and take it easy for a minute, find a moment to fool around, have fun, be silly.
Oh yeah, and I found the cabinet. I can answer that question now.
Lots of Love and fun….Christina
We work with a non-profit where I know the founder personally. So many Charities keep over 50% of donations received as salaries for their top executives. Therefore most of your money does not go to the children. There are so many loopholes in the rules and regulations of a non-profit organization that make this misappropriation possible.
I have searched for years to find someone who is honest and cares about the kids. His name is Richard Lawson. He gives everything that comes in to those children. He works in Uganda | Kenya | Rwanda | Thailand | Myanmar | India | Nepal | Indonesia He travels to each orphanage to help them become self-sustainable. But even if they are able to provide food and shelter for themselves, there are many “extras” that are beyond their reach.
Our newest project is to provide the Orphanages in Eastern Bali and India with Washers and Dryers.
The poverty there is often unimaginable for us here in the US. Yet those kids are the sweetest, most loving little kids I have ever met. The women who take care of them give their all to make a home for them.
I am calling on you who read my posts to open your heart and give just a little to help two of the orphanages to buy some washers and dryers.
There are about 18 kids in Eastern Bali. They live on a piece of land filled with dirt, bugs and absolutely no amenities. Showers are a bucket of water, clothes are hand-washed in the same bucket and hung to dry on a line in the dust.
Their goal is to become self-sufficient. They have planted papaya and banana, which they eat and trade for other foods . They are raising pigs and chickens. Each of the kids have jobs to contribute to the “family”. Some of these generous, loving, happy children were rescued from the streets where they sometimes lived for years.
The Orphanage in Vishakapatnam, India has less ability to sustain itself. It is a work in progress. Many of us are supporting those kids to create a better living environment for them.
A small amount from a few of you would buy those washmachines. Search your heart. For more information and donations go to www.lovingorphansglobal.org
Our goal is to collect $4000 by Christmas 2013
We currently have $50